
Beauty Is Perhaps a Matter of Distance
Skin, hair, shadow, texture. A closer look at beauty, where the smallest details matter and being seen means letting your guard down.
In conversation with
‘Beauty has nothing to do with standards set by others.’ On inherited ideals and the point at which self-expression becomes conformity.
TEXT by IRÈNE SCHÄPPI
PHOTO by ZHAO LANXIN
Conversation
‘Pale skin, big eyes, under 100 pounds.’ That, Zoey Xinyi Gong says, was the ideal she grew up with in China, and she calls it toxic. Today she practises food therapy rooted in Chinese medicine and guides wellness journeys, based between China and France. From there, she watches two very different ideas of beauty and health meet.
Chapter I — Standards
Irène
You grew up with a very specific idea of what a beautiful woman was supposed to look like. How do you see it now?
Zoey
Like everyone, I thought beauty was just physical. When I was growing up in China, the beauty standards were toxic: pale skin, big eyes, under 100 pounds. But now I see beauty as being your original self: passionate, unique, comfortable with your natural features. Beauty has nothing to do with standards set by others.
Irène
Do you still catch yourself thinking about becoming more beautiful?
Zoey
I don’t feel pressure to be beautiful. I realise I don’t really think about ‘how can I become more beautiful?’
Chapter II — CORRECTION
Irène
You returned to China in 2024. What struck you most about the beauty culture you came back to?
Zoey
I moved back to China in 2024, and I absolutely hate the beauty standards here. There are so many invisible eating disorders and unhealthy practices because of them. Almost everyone is trying to lose a lot of weight. Many young girls choose plastic surgery or make-up that doesn’t suit their skin tone to achieve the ‘European’ look. But for me, the problem is not that they are doing these things, or the tools they use. The problem is why they are doing it: the unhealthy yet incredibly celebrated beauty standards on social media, and pressure from men.
Irène
Visible ageing seems to stir very little in you, far less than the attempt to erase it. Why?
Zoey
I’m not sure it stirs anything. I think ageing is natural and we should accept it more. It stirs me more when I see someone who looks visibly younger than they should and has visibly had a lot of work done. That I find a bit unnatural.
Irène
And yet you’ve tried Botox yourself. What happened?
Zoey
I had Botox on my forehead for the first time when I visited Thailand. It was an ‘oh, let me try it, why not, it’s everywhere’ moment. I felt excited and curious beforehand. But afterwards, my forehead was so stiff, and I hated that unnatural feeling. I think it changed my expression too. Ironically, I was glad I had a fringe, so nobody could see my now very wrinkle-free but way-too-smooth Botox forehead.
Chapter III — LOOKING
Irène
You know exactly what social media rewards. Are you still affected by the images it puts in front of you?
Zoey
I think my self-image is pretty set now, so these things don’t affect me in a meaningful way. But when social media shows me images of ‘perfect’ bodies, ‘perfect’ skin and ‘perfect’ features I don’t have, it does grab my attention.
Irène
And when you are the image, when you’re the one making videos, what changes?
Zoey
I often put on make-up just for my videos. I’m happy to wear make-up and feel put together. But I notice that videos where I look ‘hot’ in the conventional sense, with more make-up and dressed up, get me a lot more views. Overall, it doesn’t really affect my day-to-day life. I don’t change myself for content, and I think my audience appreciates that. What I hear a lot from people I meet on the street is that I look the same as I do online.
Zoey left Shanghai for New York at sixteen, trained as a dietitian and eventually found her way to Chinese medicine and food therapy. What she distrusts is rarely make-up or Botox in itself. It is the reason for reaching for it: the moment a choice begins to look suspiciously like somebody else’s standard.
Chapter IV — Origins
Irène
When you strip all of that away, what is your first memory of beauty?
Zoey
My mother putting on her lipstick.
This interview was conducted in writing for the Super Flattering Beauty Index, published in Super Flattering Edition N°01 / 2026.







